The Sims 3 (PC)
Hey look, more Sims!
6/3/2009 3:02 PM | 10 Comments | Page 2 of 3
What's Hot: New personality traits like unlucky and clumsy mean you can finally create that Gilligan character you always wanted.
What's Not: EA is holding back some of the best stuff for download.
Irony alert! You can play videogames inside the Sims 3.
Forgive the game business if it seemed like a dumb idea. It just wasn't the right crowd, like showing a Julia Roberts film at a monster truck rally, or talking monster trucks at a wine tasting.
All these years, and millions and millions of copies later, we have forgotten that the Sims never fit into the bad-ass Doom and Quake crowd. But it's been hanging around so long, we just assumed that it was one of the gaming greats. That The Sims was hardcore.
The Sims 3 is less a carefully monitored repolishing in Grand Theft Auto mode and more like a new season of "Sex in the City." If you liked it before, you'll tune in now. If you haven't been following along, this is the season to start watching.
So go back to your E3, Mr. Gamer. The Sims will be around when you get back.
For the longtime Sim player, here's the good news: EA has made sure that the upgrade to this year's model packs plenty of new-game smell. Under the hood, the game is a processor-hungry monster packing all kinds of tweaks and improvements sure to titillate serious Sims fans.
The most notable upgrade, although not the sort of thing that gets touted on the box, is that the day-to-day maintenance of your Sim has gotten easier. While making breakfast and looking for a job might sound like a gas to a 12-year-old girl, this version of the game has figured out that taking care of the daily crap in life is not a lot of fun. Changing a baby's diaper, cleaning up after a dog in the yard, or, hell, scooping poop behind your pet monkey, isn't really that fun in real life. Why would it be enjoyable in pretend-land? Fortunately,
The Sims 3 is less obsessed about your Sims' defecation than about the fun stuff, like trying to get into your neighbor's pants.
I am an Anti-Christ! Just kidding, I want to be corporate marketing executive.
The range of weird, debauched fun in this version has taken a decided turn for the better. Sure, you could play
The Sims 3 in a classic format by creating a clan and ushering it through generations of family values and Protestant homesteading. Mom or Dad could work up the corporate ladder or head to the moon. The original Sims mined a rich vein of broken hearts and promises, and has found no reason to move onto new claims in the new version. Now you just have more ways to create a suburban social fiasco.
Thanks to a much more customizable game, you can now make your homeless guy, Hobo Jimmy, wander the streets and look in people's garbage for food. While past iterations of the game limited you to a fairly discrete number of Jerry Springer scenarios,
The Sims 3 opens up a world of disturbed hillbilly fun. Why do normal things when you can do awful, dangerous and ridiculous things? Why deliver pizza when you can just steal things for a living and marry for money?
As this version of the game seeps into the public consciousness, you'll probably hear a lot about the power-sucking features -- like a brand-new ability for Sims to actually walk from house to house rather than waiting for the game to load each parcel, and the seemingly endless variety of customizations to clothes, characters and home furnishings. The "sign up now and get $10 of free stuff from the online Sims store" makes it clear that EA plans to make a killing by selling you new Sim wares for real dollars, and not just Simoleans.
