On the off chance that somebody reading Pokémon Platinum Version review has never seen a Pokémon cartoon, touched Pokémon cards, or played a Pokémon game -- yeah, right -- allow me to explain the concept. Pokémon is a sanitized cockfighting simulation in which players stroll around a friendly fantasy world, capturing adorable little monsters (Pokémon is short for Pocket Monsters) which they enter into an ongoing fighting circuit until the little buggers take so much damage that they pass out.


In short, it's sort of like "Fight Club" with plushies.

Empleon, Infernape, Garchop, Turtwig ? some of the originality has leaked out of the Pokémon naming process; but with over 490 Pokémon now existence, it was bound to happen.

For the monsters, winning turn-based fights results in experience points and evolution. For the player, victory means money, notoriety and a shot to go down in history as one of the greatest Pokémon masters of all time.


Along the way to becoming a Pokémon master, you bike, run, walk, fly, and surf around a surprisingly large world with mountains, marshes, grasslands and coasts -- all of which serve as habitats for the 200-plus species of monsters living in the Sinnoh Region of the Poké-world.


For those of you who haven't layed any version of Pokémon since the Red and Blue versions came out in 1996, very little has changed. You still control a young punk Pokémon trainer hoping to make a name for himself and break his way into the big leagues. You still travel the world with a maximum of six monster companions whom you keep in pocket-sized cages called Pokéballs; and you still find wild monsters hidden in tall grass, water, graveyards and mountain trails.


Pokémon's turn-based fighting style has not changed over the last 13 years. Why should it? Nintendo has sold 186 million Pokémon games worldwide. This has got to be the best-selling handheld game series ever.


In other words, it works. It works well.

The new Global Terminal marks the opening a worldwide marketplace for Pokémon capitalizing Nintendo DS' Wi-Fi capabilities.

Even less has changed from Pokémon Diamond Version and Pokémon Pearl, the first Nintendo DS entries into traditional Pokémon adventuring. Pokémon Platinum Version is sort of a version 1.1 of those earlier games with some notable updates.


The most striking change between Platinum and its predecessors is the addition of the "Distortion World," a break from the mundane Sinnoh Region that will remind players of either the works M.C. Escher, or the Looney Tunes episodes in which Daffy Duck meets Marvin the Martian on his home world. One moment you are trading jabs with the fanatics of Team Galactic, a crime syndicate bent on perfecting the world (classic Poké-players may remember the misguided Team Magma/Aqua ecologists of Pokémon Sapphire and Ruby fame, and the glory-bond bounders of Team Rocket from the early days of Pokémon.); the next moment, you see a portal to a new dimension. Super Mario Galaxy fans will feel right at home with this area's setting and physics.


Less striking but more substantial than the Distortion World are the innovations in connectivity Nintendo has added. There is a new "Global Terminal," which allows players to trade Pokémon worldwide. There is also a new "Wi-Fi Plaza" with mini-games and a Rose Bowl-style Pokémon parade.


According to Nintendo, Platinum features three new "forms" of familiar Pokémon, and 210 species. You can also import old monsters from the Ruby, Sapphire, FireRed, LeafGreen, Emerald, Diamond and Pearl onto your Platinum card.

Giratina, the poster child for Pokémon Platinum, looked like a caterpillar in a battle mask in Pokémon Pearl and Diamond. For this outing, the Pokémon has re-emerged with spikes where some of its legs once were.

Platinum is a solid bet for people who like traditional-style role-playing games with turn-based combat. The first half of the game is a bit on the linear side, leading players by the nose from one gym or town to another; but huge new horizons open once you beat the existing champion.


But for bargain hunters looking to get the most entertainment hours for their dollar, Platinum is unbeatable. With a good 20 or 30 hours of storyline adventures, and untold hours available for catching and leveling up every monster in Sinnoh, Platinum offers gameplay at pennies on the hour. These days, that's not a bad deal.


This review is based on a retail copy of the game provided by the publisher.


Want more? Get the first hour in Kyle Orland's Games for Lunch: Pokémon Platinum Version.