Tokyo Santa Caption Contest, Final Day

Thumbs up!
10/12/2009 9:51 AM | 36 Comments | Page 1 of 1

John Teti
John Teti
Status: Nothin' but net
That's right, it's the final day of the caption contest, as we've reached the bottom of my magical bag of prizes. The only way we could keep the contest going is if I suddenly traveled to some other strange country, like Sweden. I have no plans to do anything of the sort.

As usual, the funniest/cleverest/most marvelous caption, as judged by me, will receive a draw from the Tokyo Santa Grab Bag. Then there's today's bonus prize, and I've saved the coolest for last. It's a Famicom replica controller that, truth be told, looks very little like the actual Famicom controller! BUT it hooks up to your Wii Remote as a Classic Controller substitute, and it has a "turbo" button. That's almost as good as the old "slow-motion" button that hit Start really fast. Impress your easily impressed friends! Here's a picture of your bonus prize in the box:

Retro Controller
And here it is carefully removed from the box, solely for photography purposes, and I only sneezed on it a couple times:

Retro Controller
To get this vaguely Famicom-esque Wii controller, write a caption for this photo of Crispy Gamer Senior Writer Scott Jones at a Japanese baseball game. Were we hungover that day? The world may never know!

Retro Controller
I'm also submitting this as the photo to accompany all future "Buy It!" reviews on Crispy Gamer.

So go nuts on this one, and on Day 3, Day 2, and Day 1. We'll end the contest at, oh, let's say 5:00 Eastern tomorrow (Tuesday). Winners announced shortly after. Now be funny!

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Comments

  • girlgamer21
    girlgamer21

    10/18/2009 11:30:53 AM

    DOES THIS LOOK INFECTED??

    Reply »
  • KingArmery

    10/15/2009 8:53:52 PM

    "Everything's better in Japan. Even my thumb!"

    Aww, I'm too late.

    Reply »
  • johnteti
    johnteti

    10/15/2009 8:36:55 PM

    Winners revealed tomorrow!

    Reply »
  • Palalong
    Palalong

    10/15/2009 2:38:56 PM

    I believe everyone lost

    Reply »
  • w1ndst0rm

    10/15/2009 11:12:14 AM

    So were there any winners?

    Or are we all still losers?

    Reply »
  • Palalong
    Palalong

    10/13/2009 5:04:20 PM

    @ScottJones:
    Truth Jones, when I read that you were actually sober my first thought was "why?"

    Reply »
  • nrromack
    nrromack

    10/13/2009 3:42:25 PM

    I poop rast!

    Reply »
  • joho
    joho

    10/13/2009 1:46:02 PM

    @ScottJones:

    http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/alcoholism/11522-ice-cream.html

    ice cream sandwiches...

    Reply »
  • DiTrent
    DiTrent

    10/13/2009 1:42:46 PM

    "Hey John, pull my thumb"

    Reply »
  • ScottJones
    ScottJones

    10/13/2009 1:20:00 PM

    I was actually SOBER in this photo, despite the siren call of all the keg-toting ladies in the vicinity. (Teti and I had ice cream sandwiches. We were wholesome that day.)

    You people really have a low opinion of me.

    Which, now that I think about it, is probably exactly where it should be.

    -jones

    Reply »
  • drrtydan
    drrtydan

    10/13/2009 1:11:12 PM

    I'm crushing your head!!

    Reply »
  • Scrimshaw

    10/13/2009 3:49:36 AM

    Last night wa.... Oh, Hi Boss! Everything's great here.... Hungover? Of course not, I'm still drinking!

    Reply »
  • TaintedKane
    TaintedKane

    10/12/2009 10:42:31 PM

    "DUDE.... My thumb is WAYYYY bigger than the Japanese baseball players. Don't you love acid?"

    Reply »
  • piccolo13
    piccolo13

    10/12/2009 5:44:53 PM

    "This is the coolest football game ever man....I mean it!"

    Reply »
  • joho
    joho

    10/12/2009 5:30:29 PM


    ここで、私のうんこですか?ちょうどここにいた!それを食べるのですか?

    Reply »
  • Mr.Mr.
    Mr.Mr.

    10/12/2009 5:20:31 PM

    “Dammit, Scott! For the last time, stop saying ‘I’m playing RBI Baseball!’ Here, its called Pro Yakyuu Family Stadium! FAMILY STADIUM!”

    Reply »
  • dr_anomaly

    10/12/2009 4:43:22 PM

    "Hey! Does this smell funny to you?"

    Reply »
  • Matt Coughlan
    Matt Coughlan

    10/12/2009 4:41:58 PM

    "Dude. My thumb has a crapload of pixels."

    Reply »
  • Mr.Mr.
    Mr.Mr.

    10/12/2009 2:57:32 PM

    “TOKYO, Sept 27 – Tokyo Giants’ left fielder, Kenny “Refty” Sakamoto was killed yesterday at a charity game event for lightly battered children. The children from the ‘Tempura Home’ watched in horror as their favorite player was crushed under the thumb of a giant intoxicated American.”

    Reply »
  • DoctorJest
    DoctorJest

    10/12/2009 2:55:50 PM

    "Sake: Helping geeks enjoy sport for over a century."

    Reply »
  • Palalong
    Palalong

    10/12/2009 2:55:16 PM

    "Hello beer keg toting lady, are you in need of a husband? Don't worry, I am housebroken. *nice guy pose*'

    Reply »
  • Palalong
    Palalong

    10/12/2009 2:52:57 PM

    "Our team will definitely win this game! *Nice guy pose*"

    Reply »
  • joho
    joho

    10/12/2009 2:45:51 PM

    "BOW BEFORE ME!" He bellowed, brandishing his massive thumb and towering over the lone man left quivering in left field. "YOU ARE LESS THAN AN ANT TO MY GREATNESS." Only the slightest hint of doubt flashed through his mind: Why did the crispy gamer only get him a one-way ticket?

    Reply »
  • Palalong
    Palalong

    10/12/2009 2:37:45 PM

    "Upon hearing that many things have come out in Japan that have purportedly caused seizures, Jones concluded that he could never be too cautious, even at a baseball game"

    Reply »
  • DoctorJest
    DoctorJest

    10/12/2009 2:28:48 PM

    "The Thumbs-Up: Just one more thing the Japanese can do better than the West."

    Reply »
  • joho
    joho

    10/12/2009 2:05:05 PM

    Even a rousing game of baseball, surrounded by throngs of fellow enthusiasts, couldn't erase from his mind the terrible things he had done with that thumb only hours before.

    Reply »
  • Hardsix
    Hardsix

    10/12/2009 1:59:56 PM

    "Dude are you okay?"
    must not throw up, must not throw up ,must not throw up...
    /thumbs up

    Reply »
  • Hardsix
    Hardsix

    10/12/2009 1:59:41 PM

    "Dude are you okay?"
    must not throw up, must not throw up ,must not throw up...
    /thumbs up

    Reply »
  • w1ndst0rm

    10/12/2009 1:25:08 PM

    Oh man, guys. Stuff like your posts hit me while grocery shopping this morning. But I didn't go that far, I think. Here it goes:


    It takes a hungover American, as good looking as he is, to out racist the Japanese and Aussies.

    Reply »
  • Palalong
    Palalong

    10/12/2009 12:41:22 PM

    "Mister Jamesu says, stadium look better with McDonalds in Left field"

    Reply »
  • johnteti
    johnteti

    10/12/2009 12:07:18 PM

    [Deleted b/c problem with article was fixed]

    Reply »
  • joho
    joho

    10/12/2009 11:49:57 AM

    @joho:

    that is a excerpt from my new book "Turning Japanese: The Threat of 80's New Wave to Racial Purity"

    Reply »
  • joho
    joho

    10/12/2009 11:44:42 AM

    "Wait! Did my hand shrink? And why does my skin have this yellowish tint?!? OH GOD MY EYES! I can barely see... OTH THIT! MY TEEF, MY TEEF ALL BURLGING! HERLP ME!" Thus did the transformation fully resolve itself and he became the very stereotype he promoted. He could never return to the fold of the Aryan Brotherhood in this condition. All that was left for him was to accept his fate and spread his mongrel seed.

    Reply »
  • Johaan

    10/12/2009 11:24:09 AM

    In Soviet Japan, the hand thumbs up you...

    (All I got, need to catch a flight. Good luck all).

    Reply »
  • Johaan

    10/12/2009 11:16:18 AM

    Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A, Start.

    Crispy Gamer prize unlocked!

    (I had to, now to think of one for the game.)

    Reply »
  • w1ndst0rm

    10/12/2009 10:37:51 AM

    Pictured here is Scott's reaction, along with his heartfelt approval, of all of w1ndst0rm's posts - and captions!



    (wink, wink)

    Reply »

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