Crispy Gamer

5 Minutes/5 Games: NES Vol. 1


In this new segment, I?ll play five games, chosen at random, for only 5 minutes. I will then give you my quick impression of those games and if I would continue playing it. Hopefully this will let us both see some old games that we have likely never seen before. For this volume, I chose to highlight NES games.

Gun Nac

Gun Nac

Ah, an old-school top-down shoot-em-up a la MUSHA for the Sega Genesis. I love Shmups and this one particularly reminds me of Star Prince, a fictional 8-bit game made for Retro Game Challenge on the DS.

Some chick with blue hair is giving me bombs for free. Awesome. The game quickly shows me all off the power-ups and I try all of the different weapons. There?s your standard straight shot, homing waves, laser beams, and my favorite, a fire laser flamethrower. Yeah that?s right; it?s a fire laser and a flamethrower, or something like that.

Also, the enemies range from ships, asteroids, to BUNNIES THAT ARE THROWING CARROTS. And the main boss for this stage is a mega-bunny that calls on even more bunnies to attack me. I have no words.

Will I play this again? Yes, I love killing bunnies.



Remember the Daft Punk song with River City Ransom characters? There was a ninja looking guy also dancing around in that video. I?m pretty sure the main character in NARC is that guy except he?s not a ninja, just a machine gun/rocket launcher wielding narcotics officer? I don?t know really, I?m desperately trying to fill in the blanks.

This game was terrible, I jumped into this shooting side scroller and got shot five or six times before realizing that you need to press B twice to jump and A twice to use your rockets. I also noticed that if you stand still its possible the enemies won?t hit you, ever. Think of this game as Contra with all of the fun sucked out of it.

Will I play this game again? No way. Though I am glad I know where that ninja looking dude came from.

Ikari Warriors


Remember those sections in Contra games where it was top-down and you could shoot in 8 directions? That what this game is. I hate that style of play. What makes it even worse is that your character moves painfully slow and one shot kills you. Oh, and you only have three lives as well. Goody.

There is a two-player option however, which could be hilarious. I?ll see if I can find someone I don?t like to share this torture with me. I?m seeing the advantage of only playing the games for five minutes now.

Will I play this again? Only to try 2-player. Otherwise, I think I?d rather stab myself in the toe.

Yoshi?s Cookie

Yoshi's Cookie

Score! I happen to love this game. Yoshi?s cookie is a fast-paced matching tile game where you can only move entire rows or columns. Couple that with three groovy songs to choose from and a frantic versus mode to boot, and you?ve got a great puzzle game.

A friend of mine always loves to get wasted and pop this in her NES. The versus mode has tons of special ?weapon? effects that, for example, scramble your board, or make the center squares not visible. Yoshi?s Cookie is great either as a party game or as a serious competitive game, if you?re good, that is.

Will I play this again? I have absolutely no doubt. To me, it?s an NES classic.

Deadly Towers

Deadly Towers

The tower is most certainly deadly, that?s for sure. The game moves like Zelda, if Link was three times as huge and could only throw swords. The first room they start you in is alright; there is just one enemy. Enter the next room and spiders, fireballs and magical dust appear everywhere and everything does massive damage. And if I?m near a cliff and get hit, you fall, instant death.

There were also occasional rooms where I walked in, got hit by something immediately, moved backwards into the previous room only to be it by something else which pushed me back into the room where I was hit in the first place. Endless loops of inevitable death. Great. The difficulty is like Demon?s Souls, but even far more unforgiving. You didn?t think that was possible, did you?

Will I play this again? I think I would rather eat my own hand.

Overall Winner: Yoshi?s Cookie
Overall Loser: Deadly Towers


I agree with your review. Also, Ikari Warriors is actually one of my favorites. - Scott Safadi

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