Developer: Tilted Mill Entertainment

Publisher: Got Game entertainment

Release Date: Sept. 20, 2008

System: PC

ESRB Rating: N/A

Official Web site

0:00 When Got Game e-mailed me asking if I wanted to try out a press copy of this action-RPG expansion pack, I said yes. And now you know just as much about the game as I do (or possibly more, if you've played the game or something).

0:01 A vaguely Celtic jig plays over a menu screen featuring two backpacked hikers trekking into the forest from a pastoral medieval town. Very nice art style here.

0:02 I can choose from six females or five males, each represented by a classy painted portrait. I go for a blonde, short-haired girl with a red blouse because that's how I'm feeling today. DON'T JUDGE ME!

0:03 Oh, it seems I can also choose from a bunch of "character backgrounds," including a few that are dwarves, elves, goblins and orcs. They all have their own portraits, of course. I stick with a nice human Seneschal because I like the way it sounds. Say it with me now. Seneschaaaaaal.

0:04 Difficulties are Easy, Medium, Difficult and Hardcore. I can also choose a game length of Short, Medium or Long ... a rather unique touch, I think. I go with "Short," since I am just planning to play for an hour at the moment.

0:05 The game spends this minute "Creating World" and "Loading Sounds," and "Stirring Up Enemies." All the while I get to stare at a painted picture of a warrior reaching for a goblet with wide eyes while a squire holding a lantern behind him. It's entrancing.

0:06 "Your king needs you! I have decreed that you must tame this wild and dangerous territory of my realm." Build a town, increase your fame, amass an army, defeat the enemies, blah blah blah.

0:07 The "How to Play" text is very spare. I'm told that my followers and I eat one "food" a day, that townspeople can work in their shops or be taken into battle, that I click on enemies to attack them and ... that's pretty much it. The rest I have to figure out, I guess.

0:08 I customize my character by increasing her attack power and resourcefulness. The latter nets me an extra piece of food every day. That sounds like it'll be important, right?

0:09 This minute spent backing out to the main menu and lowering the resolution, so things look grainier but also animate more smoothly.

0:10 Walking around the pastoral town is as simple as clicking where I want to go. If I hold down the mouse button I break into a spry trot -- a nice touch. I like the soothing music and the occasional rooster crowing to acknowledge a new day starting.

0:11 There's a single building standing in my town ... an outpost, I'm told. It stores food and also makes as much as it consumes. It also "acknowledges my reputation," apparently. That's nice, I guess. I can upgrade it to a Manor for 20 gold. Sure, why not.

0:12 There are also two people wandering about the town, but just as I start to talk to them a couple of dark elves run in and attack. The visitors run away and I'm left to fend them off myself. I bring one down with my knife and the other one runs away scared. Three gold for my trouble! Nice!

0:15 Back to the visitors. They're Constance, a trapper; and Jim, a herder. They can each produce 2.5 food per day, but I think they'll only do that if I build them a house. Unfortunately, I don't have enough gold to do that, since I upgraded the manor. D'oh.

0:17 Besides the two visitors and the manor, my town is totally empty and totally boring. I guess I should go off and earn some more in battle, eh?

0:20 So off I traipse into the wilderness to battle some enemies. I kill a level 1 dark elf easily, but get whacked good by a level 2 dark elf. I double-click my potion mid-battle in an attempt to use it, but it must not have worked because I R dead.

0:21 Back in town, I find two new visitors, Cecily and Editha. I can't afford a house for either of them, so it's back into the wilderness for me, I guess. Not like there's anything else to do...

0:24 After another quick death to a large group of elves, I return to town with a floating message: "The king is displeased with your fame. You have 5 days to improve it or you're fired." As I read this, four more dark elves invade the town! I manage to take one out, but the others do me in. If only I could figure out how to use these damn potions...

0:26 Ah, as I hover over the potion it tells me to drag it over my corner portrait to use it. With this important knowledge, I manage to take out three level 1 dark elves hovering around the edge of town. Now I have enough gold to build a house for one visitor. Only problem: All that dying has reduced my fame, and now the visitor doesn't want to stay. ARGH!

0:29 Using the handy medieval radar that I just noticed in the corner of the screen, I manage to find a few lone dark elves and pick them off one-by-one. I'm getting a lot more potions, but not a lot more fame, which stagnates at -46 and only goes up a single point for each enemy I kill.

0:32 Hmm ... at some point my character advanced to level 3, according to my corner portrait. No wonder the dark elves are getting easier and easier to kill. I manage to clear out the Herb Field, which adds 1 to my "town quality" and raises my fame way up to -38. Huzzah!

0:34 I spend some gold to get some new visitors. They are also dissatisfied with my town and not willing to stay for good. Um, did they not see my new Herb Field? It's awesome!

0:36 The unholy area is full of easy level 1 zombies and skeletons. Picking them off brings my fame up to an astounding -29. I only have 0.8 days left to get it even higher, though.

0:39 Another death to three hardy dark elves sends me plummeting to -59 fame. I awaken to find a city under attack and die again, plummeting down to -87. Man, dying is really hard on the reputation, ain't it?

0:40 My time is up. "You Lose! Your fame is so low no one will follow you! You have lost the game, you sad, pathetic fool." Well, they did promise a "short" game.

0:41 OK, let's try this again now that I know what I'm doing. "Creating World" blah blah blah.

0:42 This time I don't waste money on the Manor and instead build a house for Hans, a visiting Craftsman. He immediately sets about making me a round shield. Well isn't that thoughtful! Thanks, Hans! Now I'm nearly bankrupt, though. Looks like it's back to the unholy area for some easy goblin pickings.

0:46 Man, these goblins go down easy, like aged brandy. The unholy area is clear and my fame is up to 27! Yes, POSITIVE 27! Hoo yeah! I'm running a bit low on food, though. Hmm...

0:47 Back in town, I find it's under attack by two minotaurs. I kill the leader easily and chase the other one to the mines on the outskirts of town. There I'm beset by some easy-to-kill wolf pups and the "valuable furs" they drop. Valuable!

0:49 The wolf pups manage to kill me with a thousand cuts, slowly whittling my health down over eight or nine battles. I finally die just as I'm dragging a potion from my inventory to my portrait. I'm still able to use the potion on my deceased corpse, somehow. Huh? Anyway, I'm transported back to the town, where my fame is now only 13 ... a little less than the 15 I started with. Bleh.

0:50 Apparently Hans was injured in the minotaur attack and can't work. I have no idea how to un-injure him, of course, because this game is really light on the whole "explanation" thing. He did finish my shield though, which I equip for some much needed additional defense.

0:52 Oh, one more thing ... it seems I'm all out of food and will starve in five days. Desperate, I advertise for new visitors. Justin, a Trapper, says he produces 2.5 food for every day he works. I build him a place and, sure enough, my bread reserves rise. Whew! Disaster averted!

0:56 A level 2 wolf drops a trap that says it will help my Trapper catch "significantly more food." Too bad he's injured and can't work when I get back to camp. Also, my Craftsman has died or abandoned the town or something, perhaps because of his injuries? Jeez, what does it take to keep citizens alive around here?

0:58 I build a house for Reginald the Herder for some more emergency food. Hopefully he'll stay alive for MORE THAN FIVE MINUTES! Maybe I'll just stay in town to protect him.


0:59 OK, staying in town is boring and the hour is up anyway.

Would I play this game for more than an hour? Yes.


Why? I feel like I'm on the verge of figuring out the path to a moderately self-sustaining town. Once I get over that hump, it seems like it could be an interesting mix of SimCity and Diablo.

This column is based on a downloadable copy of the game provided by the publisher.



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