Games for Lunch: NASCAR Kart Racing
In a nutshell: No, it doesn't make any more sense after you play it.
2/23/2009 6:59 PM | 3 Comments | Page 1 of 4
Developer: EA Sports Freestyle
Publisher: EA
Release Date: Feb. 10, 2009
System: Wii
ESRB Rating: E
0:00 The fact that a game as unlikely and self-contradictory as
NASCAR Kart Racing even exists is reason enough to give it an hour-long test drive, as far as I'm concerned.
0:01 A bit of loading, then no fuss, no muss; we're already at the title screen. There are two helmeted racers sticking out of what look like roofless, miniature versions of NASCAR cars. Their heads stick out above the top of the windshield. The most generic rock music I've ever heard plays in the background. Oh man, this is going to be exquisitely painful.
0:02 "Welcome! I'm your guide, Flagman Fred," says a crazed-looking man who speaks in an odd pidgin. "There are three things you need to know before getting started!" Is one of them "abandon all hope?" Apparently not. They are: 1) Stick close to your teammates to earn boost; 2) Run in to "Pit Lollipops" (no, I don't know what that means) for random power-ups; and 3) Powerslide. "You're all set! Start your engine and have fun!" I'll do at least one of those!
0:04 Twelve manga-fied versions NASCAR drivers are selectable, with 12 more to unlock. Each has different rankings in Slide, Zone, Grind (what is this, Tony Hawk?) and Boost. I go with Kyle Busch because half of his name is totally awesome. I also get to pick a teammate, whose stats will be added to mine. Dale Ernhardt, Jr. is Kyle's perfect complement. Hooray for balance!
0:06 Four courses out of 12 are selectable in the Quick Race: Talladega, Cactus Pass, Beltway Battle and Junkyard. Boy, after Talladega they really started ignoring that NASCAR license quickly, huh?
0:08 Tapping the 2 button before the start builds up my boost meter ... an interesting twist. And we're off. I try tapping left on the d-pad to turn, but all that does is give me a rear-view camera. Then I remember it's a Wii game and tilt the Remote to turn. The controls are surprisingly forgiving, so far.
0:10 I end up slingshotting back and forth with my teammates as we both boost past each other, always staying close enough to gain more boost, of course. It's a pretty unique dynamic for a kart racer, and makes things mildly interesting at least.
0:11 My teammate and I alternate between third and fourth place, and we're about to pass into first/second when my kart spins out for no discernible reason. After that the other racers catch up quickly, and pummeling me with items and spinning me out many times. I get an infinite boost item but I still finish sixth. Overall the racing isn't as awful as it could be, but not really that compelling, either.
0:12 Wow ... apparently I just got hit with a weapon that makes a large "Tony Stewart's Office Depot" logo bounce across in my screen, like the world's most annoying screen saver. You just lost a LOT of goodwill, game.
0:13 An easy first-place finish this time. Once my teammate and I got the lead, we just kept slingshotting back and forth without any threats from behind. I haven't had to use the powerslide yet, either.
