Developer: The Casual Collective

Publisher: The Casual Collective

Release Date: Undetermined

System: PC

ESRB Rating: N/A

Official Web site

0:00 I heard about this casual freebie from Joystiq's always excellent Free Game Club, which described it as "a platformer with an adorable shell to hide its difficulty." You had me at "platformer," but "adorable" and "difficulty" didn't hurt.

0:01 "Welcome! Use the left and right arrow keys on your keyboard to move your Buggle and collect the stars." I do, and my little grey puffy guy clambers along some stark white angled floors. Already I'm loving the gentle guitar music.

0:02 The up key jumps. My little Buggle makes an adorable little squeak when he lands. AWWW!

0:03 Stage 2 has a floor made of purple springboards, while Stage 3 introduces a slightly higher super jump.

0:04 Stage 4 has buttons that remake the terrain, while Stage 5 urges me to move quickly to collect the stars that are appearing around the stages. Thus ends the short-ish tutorial.

0:06 On to a simple map screen with a bunch of buttons to activate the various levels. Only the first one is available for now, so up and let's go.

0:07 Stage 1 done. No trick to it ... all the stars just sit out in the open. And why wouldn't they ... it's the first stage. I'm surprised that my laptop is chugging along here to display what seems like a simple 2-D game. It's run more complex games before. Maybe if I close some tabs...

0:09 Stage 2 is accurately titled "No Pressure." I like how the fine white outline shows where the next star will show up, so I can plan my next move before I collect the current star. I still don't like how all the unnecessary graphical effects cause this ridiculous slowdown. Maybe turning down the in-game graphical quality will help.

0:10 Stage 3 has spikes, which pop my Buggle when I try to take a difficult jump too quickly. Also, even though I'm on the lowest quality setting, it's still slow. This is getting really troublesome.

0:14 Stage 4 has a pond with a cute rubber duckie. My Buggle can bob along the surface, or dive slightly to get to stars beneath the waves. That promised "difficulty" still has yet to show up.

0:16 Stage 5 is a quick one, but it requires some super jumps to get through quickly. Also: The little "Aww" sound effect when you come close to a star but just miss is the cutest thing EVAR!

0:18 The goal in Stage 6 is to collect all the stars before they explode. This requires some precise jumping, which I do not have on my first attempt. I blame the slowdown.

0:20 I complete Stage 6 on the third try. The slowdown is actually helping me plan out my moves in mid-air. I'd like to close out of Firefox to see if it helps the speed, but I'm afraid it will lose my progress.

0:21 I just noticed a new tier of levels has opened up above me on the map screen. Let's try the mini-game "Buggles in Space."

0:22 The slowdown is INCREDIBLY bad as I try to guide a rocket-packed Buggle through a black field packed with 40 stars. I send myself into a passing asteroid just to put me out of my misery. There's no reason this game should be running this slowly. NONE!

0:23 Stage 7 introduces a couple of oscillating elevator platforms. The promised difficulty still remains to be seen.

0:27 Stage 8 has a complex piston system that just exacerbates the slowdown. Still, it adds a little gameplay hitch, as I need to jump on the edge of a piston and time things just right to get some stars.

0:31 Turning off the music for Stage 9 helps the slowdown marginally, but affects my enjoyment much more. Back on it goes.

0:35 The switches return in Stage 10, operating some large blue platforms/walls that need to be managed well for a quick completion time. The slowdown is worse than ever, though, and is really starting get in the way of my enjoyment. I shouldn't need a supercomputer to run a 2-D platformer, should I?

0:38 Stage 11 finally brings the difficulty a bit, with tilted platforms that require some precise movement and balancing to place the jumps. I'd like to think my amazing platforming skill gets me through on the first try, but in reality it's probably the slowdown.

0:41 Stage 12 has a sextet of slow, constantly descending platforms, made even slower by, you guessed it, the slowdown. Still, planning complex jumping routes to save some time is a challenge.

0:43 Stage 13 reminds me of a level from ninja-platforming classic N, with a floor lined with springs and a bunch of homing missiles filling the air. Of course, it's a like N played in super slow-mo.

0:48 The slowdown gives me extra incentive to guide the homing missiles into the protective walls, as each destruction speeds up the game considerably. Sigh.

0:50 The platforms in Stage 14 all rotate around a central axis, which is obviously much too much for my poor laptop to take. Of course, it also leads to odd situations where I can't tell if a surface is horizontal enough to stand on. Annoying.

0:53 As far as I can tell, solving Stage 15 efficiently relies on a previously undisclosed pseudo-double jump. It seems I can jump from mid-air after bouncing on a platform. This is incredibly useful and I'm not sure the developers intended it at all.

0:54 All that's left now is more mini-games. "Avoid the Rockets" is slow enough to be utterly unplayable. Next!


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0:56 "Pedal to the Metal" has very little to do with the rest of the game. We have an overhead view of a Buggle in a car, with headlights casting a glow on a dark road. I have to dodge trucks while collecting stars to speed up. Surprisingly, this mini-game runs at a pretty good clip, except when changing lanes.

0:58 "10,000 cm under the Seas" is like the rocket mini-game, but with a constantly propelling submarine underwater. It's just as slow, is the important part.

1:00 On a lark, I try to run the game on my desktop browser. It's silky smooth. I reset my laptop and Firefox and try again on the portable. It still slows to a crawl. I ... I just don't get it.

Would I play this game for more than an hour? Yes.


Why? I'd like to see how the game changes when played at its intended speed. After that though, I'll be moving on.

This column is based on a full Flash version of the game playable at the Official Web site.

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