Games for Lunch: DT Carnage
In a nutshell: Destruction Derby mixed with pure awfulness.
9/11/2008 7:01 PM | 0 Comments | Page 1 of 3
Kyle Orland
Status: "You can't get quality video game editorial from a value menu!" "No, really, you can't."
Developer: Axis Entertainment
Publisher: AgeTec
Release Date: Sept. 4, 2008
Systems: PS2 (reviewed), PSP
ESRB Rating: E-10+
0:00 I literally did not know this game existed until it showed up in my mailbox. I don't even know what the "DT" is supposed to stand for. But I'm not proud. "If you send it I will play it for an hour and review it," that's my motto.
0:01 The game jumps right to the title screen, with an extremely generic picture of a car and some smooth jazz music over the top. The game then loads up an attract mode demo with surprisingly good-looking cars, a somewhat jumpy frame rate and more generic rock. The bare bones presentation reminds me a of an original PlayStation game, not entirely in a bad way.
0:03 After playing around with some options, it's off to the "League Conquest" mode. It was either that or the aptly named "Pick up & Play" mode.
0:04 "So you're the rookie," says a textbox with a disturbing picture of a red-headed instructor. "Let's see what you've got. You probably don't even know your left from your right yet, so I don't expect to be impressed." Hey, that's not fair! Left is the one where your hand makes an "L"!
0:05 The instructor takes control for the first lap, explaining how the game works as he goes. "Kill or be killed" is the mentality. I can drive through gates to get items. There are also "skills" which improve your driving or deter others.
0:06 The engine whine sound is already incredibly annoying. So is roar of the crowd as I drive by.
0:08 There are only three cars on the long, boring, oval track. I pass one quickly and take the other out with a "reverse steering" skill. Kind of fun watching him lose control and hit the wall. The driving physics are passable so far, but not too impressive. Driving on grass feels a lot like driving on the road, for instance.
0:09 I use my "extremely deadly boost" skill on the second lap, motoring right into a land mine as I do. My car is on fire, but still driving just fine, thank you very much.
0:10 So one car is now a burned out husk and the other is on the complete opposite side track. Seems things won't end until I actually take him out, but I hit a heavy pylon, go flipping in the air, and get "retired." "Don't worry about it... some more training and you'll be a DT Racer in no time." How embarrassing.
0:12 On to a "survival training" race where I have to, uh, survive longer than the other cars.
0:13 I really miss the analog acceleration that's standard in modern racing games. Getting the RPM meter to stay in the red line before the race is tough with the X button.
0:14 "You've completed the lap first! Other cars got damaged." How in the world does that makes sense?
0:15 I'm all alone in first, damaging cars with my wicked lap-finishing skills. I'd use my weapons on the other drivers -- if there were any nearby.
0:16 "Trap Activated" says an on-screen message as a blue sheen surrounds my car. Then it disappears. What was that?
