Games for Lunch: Strong Bad's Cool Game for Attractive People, Episode 1: Homestar Ruiner
In a nutshell: Cooler than a bag full of fluffy-puff mashmallows.
9/2/2008 8:19 PM | 0 Comments | Page 2 of 3
0:18 On to the real game. Strong Bad's sleeping on the couch with a bag of chips stuck to his gloved hand. He bursts into song: "Please stop trying to handle my style, 'cuz you can't." Catchy!
0:19 Predictably enough, the game starts with the reading of an e-mail. Some guy from "Frenchtown" wants SB to beat up Homestar. SB makes fun of the Frenchy and makes a joke about snot, and then decides pummeling HS is actually a good idea. "I bet I can find Homestar at Coach Z's track, running in place or something."
0:24 Playing around on the lappy, I find an option to actually compose messages "From the desk of Strong Bad." I write a missive to an SB-loving friend who recently bought the game: "Dear Bruce, How are you liking my awesome game? Isn't it awesome? Crapfully crap, StrongKyle." He'll appreciate it.
0:25 Quote of the moment: "Come on, let me in. I just want to punch you a few hundred times." Another one to use in everyday life.
0:28 "Sometimes I like to just stand in front of the window and start flexing, just in case a women's volleyball team is walking by." Every line is a gem!
0:30 I'm liking all the hidden jokes in the background, like the pennant for "Mediocre Institute! Flying OK!" Reminds me of "The Simpsons."
0:32 I've stumbled upon a new Teen Girl Squad at the drawing table! "All right gals and gal-related girls, it's time to look ... soooo good!" It's even interactive! After watching them prattle on, I can give each annoying teen girl stuff, like "Pubescence perfume: Accentuate the Awkward!" It even affects the story: At one point, a flaming basketball ignites the Ugly One's hairspray-infused head. Impressive.
0:33 "IT'S OVER!" Strong Bad tells me I got zero points. I didn't even know I was being scored. Oh, well, I'll try again later. Also, apparently SB's Really Cool Teen Girl Squad Ideas from last night are missing. Intrigue!
0:35 Strong Bad has an extremely short-lived seven-track player. "Your lack of a play button was your undoing." Heh.
0:36 On the "fun machine" (which looks a lot like a Famicom) SB sits down for some "
Snake Boxer 5 ... so much better than the unfortunate
Snake Boxer 4: Lady Snake Parade." I play the game in an over-the-Strong Bad-shoulder view.
0:37 From an overhead view, my boxer slides up and down next to a snake. Both are rendered in endearing, pixilated, Atari-era graphics. I punch and the snake lunges. "The black border is really great in how it lets you imagine a crowd cheering you on," comments Strong Bad, accurately.
0:39 As I knock out each snake, it's replaced with a faster/more powerful/differently colored version. I take out five before I fall three times and turn into a gravestone. Strong Bad's comments were cute, but too repetitive. "Your drunken style is no match for the five pixel power punch" is funny the first time, but not the fourth time in three minutes.
0:40 There's a code for the controversial "hidden mode" in the instruction manual, which is conveniently missing. I smell a mission!
0:41 Looks like I'm out of stuff to do in the house, so up goes the map and we're off to the track! Homestar is there stretching to some awesome sports-themed trumpet music.
