Games for Lunch: Zoids Assault

by Kyle Orland, 7/24/2008 8:27 PM

(Page 3 of 3)

0:45 Back to super-exciting, text-based news! War games are going on. Wait, is this still the flashback or is it the "present" now? No time to figure it out... it's back to Senate testimony. Blah blah debt blah blah negotiations blah blah Claw of Flame blah war with the Gods blah blah mighty giants' brutal war with the humans blah blah. "This isn't story hour!" says one Senator. Apparently, it is...

0:47 The still shots of the Senate floor are repeating themselves with alarming frequency. The dull voice acting and expository monologue are putting me to sleep. Gotta hold out! Only 13 minutes to go...

0:49 Cut to another flashback battle, this one apparently the day after the last one. A possible invasion force from Jamil! The game finally explains the "support attacks" that were triggering in the last battle. Apparently, any units in attack range will help out any other units during their attack turn. "Once again, things that could have been brought to my attention YESTERDAY!"

0:52 Installing new skills/weapons is a slow, clunky, menu-based affair. I don't know why I'd expect anything less, at this point.

0:55 My units are split into two squads across the map this time. Of course, the enemy doesn't even move unless they're directly threatened. Not that I mind. Units... converge!

0:57 Now that I understand the "support attacks" system, it's much easier to follow what's going on. Not more interesting... just more understandable

Would I play this game for more than an hour? No.

Why? Confusing generic story meets confusing, generic turn-based strategy gameplay for an overall confusing, generic experience.

This column is based on a final review copy of the game provided by the publisher.

Want to know more about Games for Lunch? Check out the FAQ here.

For more Games for Lunch, visit the official GfL blog.
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